Drowning
by Shaz1
Summary: When a case ends badly, Frank steps in to guide his son through the aftermath. Second and final chapter posted due to demand!
1. Chapter 1

Drowning

By Shaz1

Disclaimer- none of the recognised characters belong to me, until the DVD box set eventually gets released and then they will constantly live in my DVD player!

I don't normally post stories whilst in the midst of a longer one (like Blood and Thunder), but this just won't leave me alone!

Drowning

"Doesn't it ever get to you?" the lone detective asked the police commissioner as he pulled out the stool beside him and perched on it.

"I wouldn't be human if it didn't son" the top police officer replied softly, observing the slight tremor to the young man's hand as it grasped at the whiskey glass. He knew that he would find his son in this bar, it was where he had gone when Joe had died, where he had visited when his partner had been shot and where he had disappeared to when Jamie had told him that he was joining the police force. Frank sat it out as his son remained silent, his face pale and sullen in the low lighting of the bar. Linda had called her father in law when Danny had failed to return home, and she had already fielded concerned phone calls from his loyal partner Jackie. Danny made no move to talk to his father, his thoughts travelling at a hundred miles an hour in his skull, and he welcomed the numbing effect that the scotch was having on him. He ordered another with a mere nod of the head, and downed it in two gulps. "Take it steady son" Frank warned, not intending on nagging his son, but hating to see him taking solace in alcohol.

"Take it steady? I'm a grown man pop" Danny retorted, ordering another to prove that he could do as he pleased. Frank sighed, partly in frustration, but mostly in concern- he hated it when Danny became dragged down into one of his black moods. He remembered the boy that had joined the marines, happy and relaxed- excited at his new life, at his chance to see the World and serve his country. Would he have done it if he had known what would happen in Iraq? He honestly didn't know, he supposed that the same could be said for the police service. No one could ever fathom the horrors that a police officer would see every week of their working lives, the people that they have to deal with and the diverse societies that they have to form links with. If they had known would any of them have chosen the path that they had?

"It gets to you because you are human Danny, because you care" Frank told his son softly, he had been worried to hear about his son's latest case as soon as he had been assigned it. He knew how certain things pushed the younger man's buttons and he had felt a shudder run through him when he had heard the outcome of this latest incident. "Its not your fault son" he told him softly, drinking from his own whiskey. Danny snorted at the comment, he closed his eyes but in the darkness the images just further haunted him.

"Who else's fault is it Dad?" he asked sourly, reaching for the fresh glass presented to him by the bar tender. Frank sighed, Danny was a damn fine detective and he was so proud of him- and he hadn't done anything wrong at all, they had been a mere moment too late to save the young girl and she had died in Danny's arms. Frank knew that it would be a day of his life that would haunt his son for forever.

"Danny you can't save everyone all of the time" he told his son emphatically.

"So how come you are here trying to save me?" Danny retaliated, before he got to his feet and unsteadily left the bar, leaving a worried father, colleague and boss behind.

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Danny walked through the streets of the city, New York had always been his home, and he would never live anywhere else, but the landmarks that he passed only signified previous pain and hurt, each area having seen another death. His life was surrounded by death and distrust- even his own family with the loss of his mother and his brother. He stopped and looked out across the water, his thoughts drifting as the effect of the alcohol wore off. His father had been trying to help him, he knew that now, but he had reacted out of his own pain and need to vent his anger at the world. He had been investigating a kidnapping in which a six year old girl had been taken from close to her house- he had been assigned many similar cases before, but they had all ended well. He had worked all the hours under the sun and finally located an address that the perp used, when they had arrived at the scene she had been there barely breathing. He had picked her up and held her in his arms, and a few moments later she had died. There had been nothing whatsoever he could do to bring her back, but if only he had been quicker.

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Frank stood in the dark, watching his son from a distance. He could see the waves of hurt radiating from the younger man as he stood looking out over the water. He wished that he could turn back time to help his son, help him get to the child in time, then they wouldn't be here now. Having said that in his heart of hearts he knew that he couldn't protect his son from all the hurt in the world. The detective of the family felt things very deeply, despite attempts to show no emotion to the outside world. He sighed as Danny turned sightless eyes towards him, not even seeing his father. Mind made up and hands pushed deeply into his pockets he moved towards where his son stood, intent on bringing him back to them.

"Son, we need to get you home" he told him softly, placing his arm lightly around the shoulder of his unresisting son. He guided him gently towards the bench behind them and sat beside him. "There was nothing you could have done son" Frank told him "You may not believe it, and you may not like it- but nothing you could have done would have saved that little girl" he continued, not releasing his grip from his distraught son. He forced himself to swallow past the lump in his throat as his eldest son turned into him, his head buried in his father's shoulder and his body wracked with tears. "That's it son, cry it out" he soothed him, squeezing him tightly against him in the hopes of offering him whatever comfort he possibly could. Danny cried on his father's shoulder until he was emotionally and physically spent, his emotions overwhelmed him and he struggled to breathe under the weight of them. Each breath took a concerted effort as if breathing in water, but eventually he managed to get himself back in check, he eased himself away from his father and run his hands through his hair and over his tired face.

"I'm ok Dad" he told the man beside him.

"Sure you are son, sure you are"

End

What do you think? Leave it as a one shot or another chapter?


	2. Chapter 2

Chapter Two

Okay based on the reviews left, here is the second and final chapter! Thank you for your reviews!

Chapter Two

Frank drove his son home, not surprised by the silence that surrounded them. Danny had never been a big talker in relation to his emotions and now that the alcohol was wearing off he was more melancholy that even before. Sometimes Frank just had to resist the urge to grab his son and shake him, just in an attempt to make him speak about what was going on in that head of his. He pulled the car onto his son's drive way and wordlessly alighted from the car.

"You don't need to walk me in" Danny muttered to his father, frustrated that he appeared to think of him as so breakable. He was embarrassed that he had lost it like that in front of his father, he was used to portraying a hardass, cold image to the outside world- and most of the time the facade continued even in front of his closest family.

"I just want to say hello to my grandsons" Frank lied in response, his expression daring the younger man to argue with him. Danny sighed, surrendering to the inevitable. He continued walking and swung open the front door with a trace of exhaustion.

"Danny?" his wife's worried voice called out from inside.

"Yeah Linda it's me" he replied, his tone tired and weary. He headed straight into his lounge and poured himself a hefty scotch from the decanter, taking a sip before he turned back to his father, instantly noting the disapproval on the older man's face. Frank refrained from comment, and headed to see his daughter in law.

"You find him in a bar?" she asked him, guessing correctly.

"Yeah" he replied, not really having to confirm things to her. Linda sighed in exasperation.

"Is he okay?" she asked softly, she had been a cop's wife long enough to know that some things would get to her husband more than others, and when he hit a low there was little that she could do other than be there for him and support him as much as she could.

"I think he will be" Frank replied carefully. "He had a case where a child had gone missing, he got there minutes after she had been fatally wounded and she died in his arms" he told the woman in front of him that he loved as a daughter. Linda gasped at what he said, and felt her eyes filling with tears at the thought of her husband's most recent ordeal.

"Oh god" she exclaimed, shocked and upset for her husband and for the poor mother that had just lost a child. She run her hand through her hair, not sure how to proceed. "Has he talked to you about it?" she asked her father in law softly.

"A bit, I think he will open up to you more" he replied. He stepped forward and gently took hold of her biceps tenderly "I will leave you two alone, take care of him" he told her softly, knowing that she didn't really need to be told. He gently kissed her on her cheek and headed towards the door. He called out a farewell to his son, and was unsurprised by the grunt he received in response, he left leaving Danny in his wife's capable hands.

Linda took a deep breath before heading into the lounge to see her husband, she ignored the tumbler of scotch that he clutched, thinking that he deserved whatever release he could find tonight. She stepped towards him, noticing the tremble to his hand and the haunted look to his eyes.

"Hey" she greeted softly, stepping into his personal space. He looked up and she was overwhelmed by the sadness of his expression, he didn't need to say a word to express his feelings to her it was written all over his face. She reached out and enveloped him into her arms. She held him tightly, and felt the tension released from his body as he relaxed into her embrace. She held him like that until he began to edge away, he offered her a weak smile- grateful for the unconditional understanding and the contact that she had provided. "You look tired Danny, why don't you turn in?" she suggested, and he nodded- making his way upstairs silently. He stripped off and climbed between the cool sheets, his mind lost even to himself. Linda slipped in beside him wordlessly and wrapped herself around him from behind, draping her arm over his torso to offer him whatever comfort she could. She closed her eyes and prayed that sleep would claim them both effortlessly. Danny laid awake, afraid to close his eyes for what his mind might conjure up should it be allowed to run riot. Finally his exhaustion and alcohol consumption defeated him and his body relaxed into slumber.

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_Her sightless eyes stared at him as he carefully took hold of her battered body in an attempt to bring her back. "You failed me!" she hissed from beside him, her body still present in his arms. _

_"No!" he whispered, his desperate mind confused as to what was happening to him._

_"You could have saved me- look what you have done" she accused the detective, the ghost floating beside him as he frantically tried CPR in vain. "It's too late to beg god now detective! You could have saved me but you didn't" she continued, her tone harsh in her accusations. _

_"Please I tried! I wanted to save you" Danny sobbed in reply. "Please I am sorry, I am so sorry" he cried to the young girl who had clearly passed away in his arms. _

_"Sorry? I'm dead because of you, and all you can say is sorry? Not good enough Reagan!" she responded, finger pointed at him in disgust. She floated above him, her silhouette vivid and bright in anger at the wrong that he had caused. She moved at him "you don't deserve to be a father!" she screamed at him, and images of his beloved sons flashed in front of his eyes as she spoke. The young girl angry and vengeful towards the man she considered had wronged him._

_"No!" Danny screamed, unable to bear this any more._

"Hey Danny! Danny it's ok! You're safe wake up babe" Linda soothed her husband who was clearly lost in the throes of a bad nightmare. "It's ok Danny, I'm here, I've got you" she told her softly, enveloping his shaking form in her arms, keen to banish whatever demons were currently haunting him.

"Linda?" he asked in confusion, still coming round from the interrupted sleep.

"I'm here babe" she told him, not relinquishing her grip on the man she loved. He sighed against her, grateful for the embrace. "Do you want to talk about it?" she asked him, not wanting to push him, but eager to help however she could. He shook his head against her breast, not trusting himself to even speak, and allowed her to continue to hold him. Carefully she eased them both back against the pillows, and held him as he drifted off into what would hopefully be a deep dreamless sleep. Linda knew that sleep would not claim her for the rest of the night, her concern for her husband over riding her own need for rest.

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The next morning Linda was still awake when the alarm beeped, alerting Danny that it was time to get up for work. He stretched as he was dragged from his sleep. He rubbed his tired eyes and turned a concerned glance on his wife.

"Did you sleep at all?" he asked her in worry. She smiled at seeing a glimpse of her husband as his normal self.

"A little" she replied with a grin. He flashed a quizzical gaze at her. "You feeling better?" she asked him, more concerned for his welfare.

"Yeah" he replied, not expanding on his reply, he left the bedroom and headed to get shaved and ready for work. Linda smiled, unsurprised by her husband's lack of communication, and wrapping her gown around her she headed downstairs to get the boys ready for school. She was just making the waffles to meet their increasingly demanding appetites when Danny floated into the kitchen, gratefully accepting the cup of coffee that she offered him. He leant against the counter sipping it as it cooled, and watching his wife as she hustled around in the kitchen, wordlessly he finished his coffee, forgoing breakfast he stepped over to his wife and held her tightly.

"I love you" he whispered softly.

"I love you too" she replied with a smile. He finally released her and reached around her for the car keys, just as he was leaving the room and heading for the door he turned back to look at his wife.

"Thank you" he told her, and he didn't need to explain any further- his eyes locking onto hers and showing gratitude and sincerity more than any words ever could.

"You are more than welcome" she replied, and with a small smile he left for what would hopefully be a better day.

The End


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